Sunday, May 09, 2004

That's all she wrote

I finished the 6th paper about Borges I've written in the past 2 years, banged out my last film paper and threw it in the box at the English house at Bryn Mawr with a flourish. It crashed into the sides as it soared through the air on the second floor, clanging into the cardboard with a sufficiently aggressive sound to terminate my college career.

Went to TLA like a space-cadet to return my overdue movie, and found out that I owe them $25 in late fees for 5 fucking days. That's ridiculous, and I'm going to try and negotiate down to something more reasonable...if possible. Then rushed home to change and meet the rest of the class of 2004 at Founders' Hall to ring the bell in the tower. Whacking the thing with a mallet was rather appropriate, but the whole experience was a little surreal.

I saw students whom I'd never seen before in my life, and I'm sure I was "that girl" for a bunch of people as well. It was awkard, uncomfortably hot, and crowded in the tower, rather a propos for the Haverfordian experience. At the alumni banquet afterwards, I remembered why I don't like large group gatherings, and scrammed with Kaitlyn at the first excuse to leave. Seeing all of those people who I "know" or "knew" freshman year, and masses of people who are outside of my social periphery just kind of weirded me out. I had no desire to be social, to meet new people, or be bubbly. Just sat around with Klu and some of her friends, waved hi some of the crew from Leeds, and then ran like a scared rabbit. Hopefully this is not an indicator of how the rest of Senior Week is going to go. Optimism, Thea, optimism.

And for the time being, that's what I'm going for. I've got loads of shit to do before Miami, and more "homework" from TFA than I care to think about right now, but I'll deal with that later. Tomorrow, Tuesday, and whatnot. In the meantime, I'm starting to get really excited about the move, especially now that my connections at Hot Soup are trying to help me find a place to blow glass down south. That will be *key* for my future happiness =).

I also went to my last first Friday, rather accidentally. I was working at the Soup, set up the gallery and chatted with my teacher for a while, then Dave came and met me for dinner. Walking around Old City on a Friday is so much fun, especially now that it stays light until about 8:30. Out in the city with my boy, looking spiffy and eating wonderful Italian food at Gnocchi made me so happy. Coffee and tiramisu iced the proverbial cake of our evening, and put me in such a good mood that I found it hard to work when we got back to Haverford.

I'm back at the studio clocking in intern hours so that I don't break the bank on my last class here, but the thing that makes me really happy is that I know that I want to keep glass in my life, however I can. Usually I bore myself with my mediocrity in most artistic pursuits, but glass is kind of different. I'm not fantastically good yet, but there are so many technical things to learn, skills to practice, and ideas that I have, I can't wait to try them out. Like so many things, the more I learn about glass, the more accutely I realize what I dont' know/know how to do. With such an obscure, multi-disciplined medium the ignorance learning curve is pretty intense, but almost all of the people I've met by blowing class temper out the humility of constantly learning you're wrong. Glass attracts a certain eccentric personality, and I think that's cool. I often fancy myself a little eccentric sometimes, so it all makes sense.

What doesn't make sense to me at the moment is how different my life is going to be in the next year. So many things are changing that it's a little daunting, but I figure I can give myself at least until Graduation before I freak out about stuff. I deserve a bit of a break, dammit, and I'm going to take one =)

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